Read During a Big Life Change (Good or Bad)
Transitions: Making Sense of Life's Changes by William Bridges
Transitions is a book I found as required reading in one of my graduate classes. I'm glad I was able to discover this book because it's probably the
most powerful one on the list. In our 20's especially we are going through so many transitions from leaving our parent's houses to graduations to babies to marriages to loss of jobs and friends and even death and divorce.
This book makes sense of those transitions you are going through, good or bad. Something about change makes us uneasy, even the good changes.
The book explains three major steps of transition;
Endings, Neutral Zone, and New Beginnings. First is the
Ending. Endings might sound negative, but they are really just beginnings in disguise. Everyone in a transition has the commonality that they are all ending something. If you get fired, it's the end of your job. If you get married, it's the end of your single life.
Endings are new beginnings.
Next is the
Neutral Zone where you are seeking solace and alone time to process your thoughts. How long this step takes is different for each person but it's a very important step. The book makes note that you
must at some point move on from the Neutral Zone to enter the New Beginning.
New Beginnings. This is the final step of your transition where you may begin to realize that
new doors are opening up for you and most of the time for the better. You might have not reached this New Beginning had you never had your Ending.
This book is about
embracing life for better or worse and it lets you know that if you work through the steps of transition whether you realize them or not, there is also going to be a New Beginning to look forward to. That is quite comforting to me and I'll probably need to read this book again at some point.
The criticism of the book is that it may be a bit stuffy in some sections and it talks a lot about divorce which I haven't experienced at this point and some of the content might be more for people a little later in their lives but it's great to be aware of it now.
Read to Get Over a Relationship that no Longer Works
It's Called a Breakup because it's Broken by Greg Behrendt & Amiira Ruotola-Behrendt
This book is similar to
Transitions in that it shows you how to understand and let go of something, but it's more specific to
breakups. Breakups suck, but they are necessary in some instances. This book will help you get over every
loser guy/girl that you are sticking around with because you don't quite know how to let go.
It's called a
breakup because it's broken. Well it sounds so simple when you put it like that. This book is from the same writers, a married team, that wrote
He's Just Not That Into You. I like this book because it's
not some mushy archaic bullshit advice on how you should be living your life. The writer is a comedian and the book is funny. I don't have any criticisms about this book. It will just make you feel better, even if you are the one doing the breaking up!
Read for a Cult Classic Kind of Mood
The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath
The Bell Jar isn't a how to on anything and some of you may wonder why I'm even encouraging you to read such a depressing book. It's a
semi-autobiographical book by a poet I admire. If you haven't discovered this book in your angsty teen years it's time to read it now.
Published in the 60's, the main character, Esther, is a writer moving to the big city who discovers she doesn't want her life to be mundane. There are
themes of female empowerment there when she feels like everyone in her life is pushing her towards this domestic lifestyle that she doesn't want for herself.
It also goes into the mind of someone with emotional issues as the author, Sylvia Plath, was famously known for
ending her own life. And there are a couple of shocking scenes in there that may
scare virgins away from their first time. I won't spoil it if you haven't read it. The criticism I'd give is that it is quite depressing, but I will say that even though I first read this book years ago,
something keeps drawing me back. Another good book this made me think of is
Valley of the Dolls.
Read for Career Empowerment as a Female
Lean In by Sheryl Sandberg
This is another book that was required reading in one of my graduate classes. This was my favorite book out of all of the required readings. Mostly because it's such a good and fast read. This book is actually really popular right now especially within the blog community as I've noticed Sheryl does a lot of conferences.
Sheryl is the COO of Facebook so she knows what she's talking about. This is a full blown guide on women empowerment in the workplace and how the inequality between women and men needs to end. One of the points that stuck with me were when she talks about how women undervalue themselves, especially when negotiating. Men tend to over negotiate and women tend to under negotiate if they are negotiating at all. I thought that was so interesting and true.
She also isn't just saying every homemaker or new mother should leave their children. She says that no one should pass judgement on another woman's decision to stay home, but that having a successful career and children is possible, you just need to figure out how to make it work for you.
The criticisms I have are that Lean In is very much a brand instead of a movement. A lot of people love this book, but just as many people have given the book flac because Sheryl didn't start from the bottom and she was a hell of a lot more "privileged" than many of the people trying to "Lean In". Though I understand where people are coming from, I don't believe you have to start from the bottom to be inspiring. I really like her message and I agree with so many of the points she makes about women needing to stop holding themselves back. Read it and make your own decision.
Read for Healthy Eating Tips (Not Dieting)
Naturally Thin by Bethenny Frankel
This book is great for those not looking for a diet or quick fix. I can't tell you how many times I see people on Facebook talking about their diets knowing damn well that
diets don't work.
A healthy lifestyle is what works. I'm not a fan of
The Real Housewives shows but I can identify with Bethenny's no nonsense and candid personality. She's a healthy cook and she knows what she's talking about.
One of the most popular healthy eating books is
Skinny Bitch. I wanted to like that book, really, I did. But I had no idea that it was a vegan guide book in disguise. I didn't like the fact that the authors were judging me and yelling at me to become vegan.
Whatever type of eater you are, Bethenny isn't judging you, she's telling you how to live a healthy lifestyle. She makes a lot of great points like
eat natural, not low fat and you don't have to deprive yourself, just don't go overboard. Pretty common sense stuff actually.
My only criticism is that sometimes you just want to throw the book out of a window and eat a friggen brownie, like a whole brownie, not a few bites which she would suggest.
I'd like to know your thoughts if you've read any of these book and also what books you think should be read in your 20's?
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